A year in the life of an expat

This weekend, honey lamb and I will celebrate one whole year of being expatriates. This feels almost shocking to us both. Thankfully, it isn't one of those situations where you say, "OMG. That felt like FOREVER." Instead, it is more of "I can't believe that a year has already gone by."

All of this brings about a feeling of great accomplishment but also some feelings of inadequacy. I think of all the things we have done and hurdles we have crawled, scaled, scrambled and dragged each other over in the past year and feel proud. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would find myself doing something like this or ever living in this kind of situation.

However, I feel sad too that I have yet to master some of the things I hoped that I would by this blip on the time scale. My language skills are progressing at a speed best measured by geologic time. This continues to distress and disappoint me. Yes, compared to a year ago, I am much better at communicating and my reading skills are greatly improved. But there is so much I don't understand when people speak to me. Colloquial terms, idiomatic expressions, the speed at which they speak (not to mention that my hearing isn't as great as it once was) still cause major problems. Just like in the US when someone from New Jersey talks to someone from Alabama there is going to be lots of stuff that just isn't understood. Slang, accents, speed of speech. Yeah buddy....problems galore.

I still don't know as much about Indonesia and its culture as I thought I would. Yes, I understand about certain things, but there is a lot I have yet to delve into. Granted, I haven't spent near the time reading about their history, and all the different cultures as I have with language lessons so I guess it is unreasonable to expect too much. You think that you will absorb stuff. But just like in school, sleeping with the book under your pillow just doesn't get the job done. So, I will need to study a bit.

Unfortunately, you want to get out there and see and do stuff, not just read it in a book. I could be sitting on the beach in Florida and study about Indonesian history and not have a single grain of Indian Ocean sand touch my feet. I haven't quite gotten the balance right yet. Sweetums and I thought we would have it all figured out by now.

When will we ever learn.............

This one year anniversary also brings us to the ever popular photo baru (new photo) for my kitas. As you most likely remember, last years trip to "imigrasi" was a pretty memorable thing. And the picture........well, you remember. Bloated toad was the phrase I believe I used. If not, it should have been.

Today, honey bun is bringing home my passport with the latest, and hopefully greatest, photo that I get to live with for the next year. According to him, he has gotten a preview, it is much better. Well, it wouldn't have had to go to far to be an improvement. So, we shall see what my glamor shot looks like this go round.

I have also learned to not let the prices of items in the grocery make my hair stand up. There is a balance and you just have to get the things you need and also learn to compromise sometimes on brands. I have also learned that many times the things that are imported are not handled very well and are usually not made the same as the item at home. Oreos do NOT taste like this in the US and Hagen Das ice cream that has been defrosted, refrozen no telling how many times is not worth spending almost $10 a pint for. My doctor will be happy to hear such news as I shouldn't be eating that stuff anyway.

I saw in the Jakarta Post last week that there are 8 million motor cycles in Jakarta and 3 million cars. I would agree with that figure. I have been sitting in the middle of all of them, I believe, on numerous occasions. But after being here a year, I manage to not notice it as often as I used to. There are still days where I am a major backseat driver and continue trying to stomp on the brake peddle that isn't there. I have learned the fine art of either being totally amazed by what is out the window of the car and not noticing that there are about 50 motorcycles coming at me from seemingly all directions, or texting while riding is a good way to take your mind off what sometimes looks like immiment death by being crushed under a big city bus that is trying to merge on top of us.

It is still a struggle to be so far away and overwhelming at times to think of how long it takes to get from here to there. I try not to think about it too much. It makes me feel too vulnerable. I would say claustrophobic is an accurate discription some days.

For the last year, actually I didn't begin my blog until February, I have written about all kinds of things. I am not really sure who is reading the stuff that I write. Many times I feel really silly even writing it as there are much bigger problems in the world than mine.

It is also very weird having such a one sided conversation. You never call. You never write. You never send flowers. I am not always sure anyone is really listening, interested or just wishes I would stop all of this blogging. I guess the beauty of that is that if you aren't interested you don't have to read my droning on and on about my adjustment process.

With that in mind. I will close this chapter. Let us all be blessed with all the riches that really matter in life. May our imagrasi photos be beautiful. And, may our ears and hearts be filled with the telling and being told how much those we care about, are cared about.